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INTRO MUSIC

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How did you enjoy the shoot the other day?

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It was really fun.

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Yeah, it was really hot.

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I feel like

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I really enjoyed everything we got up to

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and it definitely,

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you know, the majority of the time
when we've played,

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it's been just the two of us
and it's fun to get to be watched.

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So I really enjoyed that aspect too.

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Yeah? 
- Yeah

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Yeah I remember liking anything a lot.

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Yeah.

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Yeah. And

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I think it was really fun
just how we didn't

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do all the exact same things like that
we usually would get up to.

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Yeah

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I remember that
being a really interesting fun part of it.

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Yeah, totally.

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That like, I feel like we also,
we kind of went into it

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with an expectation of like, okay, here's
some things we're going to do

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like based on,
you know, how we typically have played

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and then yeah, got to kind of like flow

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with what actually felt
right in in the situation.

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Totally
- Yeah

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I liked that too. 
- Yeah.

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What was most
challenging about the shoot for you?

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I think

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being in a new space, like just even

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keeping track of the toys
and the water and

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everything. 

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Yeah. 
- Yeah

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A little different.

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Like, getting used to the space
and fucking at the exact same time.

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Yeah, Yeah.

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How about you?

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I think for me,

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I was more nervous than I expected to be.

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I think

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the challenging part for me was that,
yeah, I was feeling a little nervous

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and trying to sort of
take that nervous energy

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and translate it
into just regular old excitement.

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And, and I think a big part of

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it was just like the space
being, you know, kind of new

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it was a little chilly.

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(laughs)

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What are your safest sex practices
and why?

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My safer sex practices.

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So I have

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two people in my life

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that I don't use
any barriers for, for like,

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you know, PIV, PIA, anything.
[*Penis in Vagina, Penis in Anus]

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And with basically everybody else
that I have sex with,

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I use condoms if my cock is going inside,

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you know, any more,
anything other than in their mouth.

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And I also I take PrEP and have for years.
[*HIV Pre-Exposure Prophylactic]

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I also

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I got a vasectomy.

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So that's, that's pretty great too

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Not having to worry about that
anymore is pretty wonderful.

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And then just conversation like, I don't

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I don't have a safer sex
talk with everybody than I have sex with

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because like, not every sexual situation,
even necessarily involves all

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that much talking.

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But, but it's a big part of

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a lot of situations that I'm in, it's like
just having a conversation

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about STI history
when we were tested last,

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all that kind of stuff
and frequent testing.

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So I think that covers everything.

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Yeah.

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I mean, I'm thinking about how

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there are certain things that are

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really important to me to like,

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Like know and trust somebody or use condoms

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if there's going to be, like, P/V or anal.
[*Penis/Vagina]

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But

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I usually use condoms, but like, not always.

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It's just really like person to person.

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So I think

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my practices, I choose

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just based on my sense of self-security and desire

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and then obviously whatever,

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however that matches up with whoever
I'm playing with

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and other things I do,

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I take Acyclovir every day
to suppress, like, herpes

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and also take PrEP.

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Mm hmm.

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Nice.

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Yeah

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Did you have other thoughts?

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For? For... Yeah.

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I'll talk about the "Why."

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Yeah.

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I feel like

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when I think about the things that were
I to catch them

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that they would have like a lasting
long-term negative impact on my life.

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I, I want to make sure my bases
are really covered on that stuff

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so that I never I basically just.

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I never want to feel like
I look back in regret

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any, any fun time I ever have.

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You know, I don't ever want 
to regret a good time.

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And I feel like

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like I used to a long time ago.

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I used to use barriers for, like,
literally everything,

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like gloves and everything.

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And then at some point,
I kind of reexamined and got to, like,

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look at like,

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okay, like,
what are the things that are most

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important to me and what are the things
that I'm missing and that I really enjoy

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about non-barriered play. And yeah,

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kind of just like went down the list
and came up with this

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that way.

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Yeah, makes sense.

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I guess
my practices have changed over time

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and the reason why would be... I, from like

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always using a lot more barriers
to being more flexible with that.

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And I think

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I think that's just from like learning

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new things about like what, what risks

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exist 

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to the best of my knowledge.

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And I mean, part of taking PrEP

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is getting tested pretty regularly.

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And so that's important to me

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and helpful when like talking
with partners about what we're going to do

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and why, just based on what we know
about our STI status and all that.

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Yeah, totally. Yeah, I feel the same way.

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I feel like my... my sort of evolution
throughout my life

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of like different levels of barrier use

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and safer sex practices has... Yeah.

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Like, as new information has come out
as or at least

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as it's been presented to me,

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it's really shifted
 the things that I feel

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concerned about, less concerned about.

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Also, you know,
the advent of PrEP has been pretty amazing

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and also,

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you know, improved treatments
for other stuff so that it's, it just,

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you know,

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and I think also like

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my own evolution around
sort of shedding ideas

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of shame around
any of it has really changed a lot.

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I feel like there was a lot
more of sort of a

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like in the past, much more of a kind of

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shame influenced,
maybe not fully shame based,

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but like shame influenced approach

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to it all.

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Whereas
now I don't feel like I have any of that.

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I feel like it's... there's...
I experience a great deal of care

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for myself and for others,

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but also a feeling of like

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also things

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happen and like people get sick
and that's actually okay.

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And, you know,
and there are certain things

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that I'm like,
I really don't want to get sick with that.

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And there are other things where I'm like,

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Yeah, there's risk,
but I'm okay with that risk.

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Yeah, for sure.

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And so is the person I'm with.

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Yeah, exactly. And yeah,
I relate to that.

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I think I don't know
if I had tons of shame

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around my sexual practices

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earlier in my life, but definitely

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like all about it following the rules.

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Less so now.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Oh, I guess what other safer sex practice
that I've gotten to do is

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I have fucked while wearing masks
all wearing masks. N-95’s.

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I've had a Yeah, I have at least one

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person who when one of us had

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a mild COVID exposure, it was one

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we weren't super worried about, but
we were still being really careful about

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in terms of like not sharing air.

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But we were really horny for each other.

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And so we were like,
"We can make this work!"

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And so we just fucked with masks on.

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And it was, it was really hot.

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Surprisingly, really fun.

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Yeah. Totally.

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If you've done porn before,
why do you continue to

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And if you haven't,
why did you decide to do it today?

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Sure. Yeah.

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I've done porn before.

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The other day.

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Yeah, I've.

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I've done porn before.

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Not a ton, but I find that

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it is like a

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pretty great source
of supplemental income for me.

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I can work less at shitty jobs.

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I also

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find it really fun and enjoy

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kind of learning new things about myself

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by having sex in a different context
when it's being filmed

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compared to when it's not porn.

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Yeah. How about you?

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So yeah, I have done porn before.

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It had been many years since I had done
porn and all the porn I had done before

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was all like it was it was more
sort of like fetish based stuff.

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It was a lot of like, spanking or like,

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like Panty Boy stuff, things like that.

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I had never really
this was the first time, like, actually,

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like, really fucking on camera

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and yeah, I've always really enjoyed it.

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I've always had an exhibitionist streak in me.

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And so that really appeals to me.

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I also

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in the same way that like whenever
there's a mirror around me,

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I find it kind of

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fascinating to watch myself do things
just because it's a perspective of myself

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I don't normally get.

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Like I have my own sort of idea
of what I look like

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when I'm talking or, I don't know,
doing the dishes or whatever.

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Yeah,

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and it's always just kind of like,
Oh, is that kind of what it looks like

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from the outside?

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Oh, that's really interesting.

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And so this fulfills
a little bit of that too.

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Yeah

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but in a much, much hotter, more fun way

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And yeah, it's a, it's a lovely source of

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Supplemental income for me

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and I don't know, it's a freeing feeling
I like getting to... I don't know,

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my sexuality is such a huge part of my
life and it's something that

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I feel like

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especially now with,
you know, the pandemic.

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I'm not like going to sex parties really,
or like doing anything like that.

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So it's something that tends to be kind of
on the private side for me now.

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And it's this is a really wonderful way

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to get to let this part of me
that I love so much

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and that I think is really beautiful
and that I want seen

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by more people
because it's like it's me.

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I want to feel seen.

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And this is a really great way
to get to do that

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while still sort of being in line with,
you know, taking care of myself around,

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you know, the world
we live in with COVID and everything. So

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I feel like it feels

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especially good
to be doing that right now.

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That makes sense.

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What's been
your favorite part of quarantine?

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Oh, um,

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couple of things.

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One is

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kind of paradoxically

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connecting with people.

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I feel like while I,
you know, was separated from,

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you know, the majority of people,
that it made me really focus

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more on like choosing like, okay, like,
who do I want to connect with

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and how and like, um,
I feel like especially early on

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when we didn't know as much about, like,
what was safe

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and what wasn't,

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It meant that I got a lot more selective.

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And I feel like

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as a result also of just like

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when you know, the me
and the other person like

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made the decision to like yes,
it's important for us to connect. Um

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you know

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distanced outside whatever that we

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I don't know there was like a deepening
of the relationship in that,

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that we were like really consciously
choosing one another and

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yeah and I felt like

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a lot of relationships
really deepened during that time.

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I felt that way

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about our relationship

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So, yeah, that's the main thing
I think about.

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The second thing is that
it was a really good excuse

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to just like play a ton of video games
and just like, not give a shit.

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Yeah!

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Just be like, "Yeah, well,
there's nothing else to do, so just..."

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built in excuse. Yeah, loved it.

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Yeah, I think it was really similar.

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I feel like my social self

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has changed a lot in ways that are

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that I really can only be grateful for

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in terms of,

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you know, understanding how

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I want to be with people
and how I want to communicate

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my desires.

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And I think kind of pressure to do that
with the people who I was with

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might be part of it, or just a lot of

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alone time reflecting on

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how I want to go out and be in
the world has led me to

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make choices that I feel more proud of,

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rather than just sort of doing
every social thing that I hear about.

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Yeah, yeah, I relate to that.

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I feel like also it's one,
one thing that's been good is that it's

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made me a lot more conscious of

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00:15:25,670 --> 00:15:29,350
my sort of everyday impact on others. Um,

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you know, having to think about it
so much more in terms

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of like trying to keep people around me
safe. Um,

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yeah, it's... I feel like it,

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it opened me up to a lot more, uh,

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in terms of like

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how to be, you know,
just like how to take care of each other,

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how to be in solidarity with each other
when we have different levels of

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need around, you know, like,

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around safety, you know, like,

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especially around, like, people in my life

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who were immunocompromised
or otherwise disabled and, you know,

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and kind of reflecting on my own
needs around similar things.

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And yeah, I feel like I'm

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just like way more on top of my shit
as a result of all that.

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And that's something
I'm like really glad for.

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if you want

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to make really hot fun, queer
porn and feel really comfortable

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00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:30,910
doing it, you should come do CrashPad.

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Yeah,
this has been a really special experience.

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00:16:33,830 --> 00:16:37,500
And if you don't want to do those things,
you should not.

308
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:39,420
Maybe watch. 

309
00:16:39,550 --> 00:16:41,080
Yeah, yeah. Just keep watching.